Draft a new first sentence - Writing your final introduction and conclusion - Part I. Research and writing: from planning to production

A manual for writers of research papers, theses, and dissertations, 7th edition - Kate L. Turabian 2007

Draft a new first sentence
Writing your final introduction and conclusion
Part I. Research and writing: from planning to production

Some writers find it so difficult to write the first sentence of a report that they fall into clichés. Avoid these:

Do not repeat the language of your assignment.

Do not quote a dictionary definition: Webster defines risk as. . ..

Do not pontificate: For centuries, philosophers have debated the burning question of. . . . (Good questions speak their own importance.)

If you want to begin with something livelier than prior research, try one or more of these openers (but note the warning that follows):

1. A striking quotation:

As someone once said, calculating risk is like judging beauty: it's all in the eye of the irrational beholder.

2. A striking fact:

Many people drive rather than fly because the vivid image of an airplane crash terrifies them, even though they are many times more likely to die by driving on a highway than by hitting it from the air.

3. A relevant anecdote:

George Miller always drove long distances to meet clients because he believed that the risk of an airplane crash was too great. Even when he broke his back in an automobile accident, he still thought he had made the right calculation. “At least I survived. The odds of surviving an airplane crash are zero!”

You can combine all three:

As someone once said, calculating risk is like judging beauty: it's all in the eye of the irrational beholder. For example, many people drive rather than fly because the vivid image of an airplane crash terrifies them, even though they are more likely to die by driving on a highway than by hitting it from the air, as witness George Miller. He always drove long distances to meet clients because he believed that the risk of an airplane crash was too great. Even when he broke his back in an automobile accident, he still thought he had made the right calculation. “At least I survived. The odds of surviving an airplane crash are zero!”

Be sure to include in these openers terms that refer to the key concepts you'll use when you write the rest of the introduction (and the rest of the report). In this case, they include calculating, risk, vivid image, irrational, more likely.

Now the warning: Before you write a snappy opening, be sure that others in your field use them. In some fields, they're considered too journalistic for serious scholarship.