Writer to writer: From think to ink - Gail Carson Levine 2014

Come again?
Poetry country

The pantoum (rhymes with tan room) is another poem form that uses line repetition. Even more than the triolet, the pantoum calls for planning. Writing one is like playing a strategy game; we always have to look ahead. When I’m working on a pantoum, I feel as if my brain cells are shooting off sparks—in a good way.

Notice how the lines repeat in this pantoum of mine:

DEPARTURE

Farewell.

You just arrived.

I must leave.

Where are you going?

You just arrived.

I have an appointment.

Where are you going?

The cliffs above the sea.

I have an appointment

with a sage who roams

the cliffs above the sea.

He speaks the language of lizards.

With a sage who roams,

I have become a wanderer too.

He speaks the language of lizards

to bring truth to reptiles.

I have become a wanderer too.

I must leave

to bring truth to reptiles.

Farewell.

Let’s go through it with the lines numbered. The left column shows the lines in order. The next column shows the repeats.

DEPARTURE

As you can see, the second and fourth lines of every stanza return as the first and third lines of the next. The last stanza has a twist in the way it repeats the first and third line of the first stanza, which so far are the only lines that haven’t repeated. The third line returns as the second line of the last stanza, and the first line becomes the final line of the poem, so the poem starts and ends with the same line, like a poetry sandwich.

We can rhyme a pantoum or we don’t have to. We can write as many stanzas as we like, but the reader won’t get the full effect without at least three. Below is another unrhymed pantoum I wrote:

HOODLUM ROBIN

He stole from the poor to make himself rich,

that horrible hoodlum Robin. Maid Marion,

who faithfully believed in his honor,

said, “Robin, I trust you no matter what.”

That horrible hoodlum! Robin made Marion

his girl with a gold ring. “Dearly beloved,”

said Robin. “I trust you no matter what.”

She kissed him and wore the glittering gift,

his girl with a gold ring. Dearly beloved

Marion swore to change his thieving ways.

She kissed him and wore the glittering gift,

the only penniless person he ever gave to.

Marion swore to change his thieving ways.

Who faithfully believed in his honor?

The only penniless person he ever gave to!

He stole from the poor to make himself rich.

Although the words in the lines repeat exactly, the punctuation and capitalization often change. Quotation marks come and go, and one of the words shows up as maid the first time it appears and made the next. Did you catch that? The second line of the poem reads like this:

that horrible hoodlum Robin. Maid Marion,

In the next stanza it’s this way:

That horrible hoodlum! Robin made Marion

I haven’t broken any rules. It’s fun to fool around with words in a pantoum.

Some poets, including me, occasionally change a word here and there in a line or two. Some poets change many words, and some keep the repetition only in the last word of the line. I’m more of a traditionalist, but you can try any way of doing it. If you’re pleased, that’s good enough.

Pantoums can explore or express an idea or tell a story. If we decide to tell a story, often the line repetition will take us in surprising and fascinating directions. We just have to remember that we’re going to need to circle back at the end to the lines from our first stanza. Sometimes that circling back requires more stanzas than we expect.

Here’s the same tip as I gave with the triolet: Drop down and fill in the repeat lines to come. This is what I did. Right after I wrote the first stanza of “Departure,” it looked like this:

Farewell.

You just arrived.

I must leave.

Where are you going?

You just arrived.

[new line]

Where are you going?

[new line]

I didn’t know how many stanzas I was going to wind up with, so I put just one more in:

[new line]

[new line]

[new line]

[new line]

Then I typed in what I knew of the last stanza.

[new line]

I must leave

[new line]

Farewell.

It’s easier to write a pantoum when each line is its own complete sentence, but we get more variety if our sentences sometimes snake into the next line. When you write yours, try it both ways.

Writing time!

Write your own pantoum, or write a few. Make yours at least three stanzas long, although more are even better.

When I teach pantoums, I have the students work on their first pantoum in pairs. You can do the same. If you want to, write your first with a friend or a family member. Then try a few on your own.

If you like, you can use a couple (no more!) of my lines to get you started. For example, you can move these two lines from my first poem into yours:

Where are you going?

The cliffs above the sea.

Or you can take any other two lines from either poem, and you can change my punctuation. It’s not stealing as long as you give me credit. Poets borrow other poets’ lines all the time. I won’t mind as long as you do this:

YOUR TITLE

—after Gail Carson Levine’s “Departure”

Or you can pluck a line or two from any poem, even from Shakespeare—and give him credit, too!

You can write a pantoum about anything, but if you’re at a loss for ideas, here are some suggestions:

• A tall tale.

• An argument.

• Your pet.

• An emotion.

Have fun, and save what you write!