Scientific writing 3.0: A reader and writer's guide - Jean-Luc Lebrun, Justin Lebrun 2021

Expectations from grammar
Set the reader’s expectations
The reading toolkit

The train

Imagine the mind of the reader as a train. The author provides the set of tracks and the signal boxes. What could go wrong?

1. No tracks—Readers, left on their own, have to pick the loose rails lying around to create their own set of tracks. Very slow going.

2. No signal box—expectations are not set, so readers chug along slowly, not knowing where to go next.

3. Faulty signal—Readers, misled, are going down the wrong tracks.

4. The train is in a tunnel—Readers tolerate being left in the dark for a short while, as long as the end of the tunnel is in sight, and clarity returns.

Creating and fulfilling the reader’s expectations guarantee that reading will be fluid, interesting, and fast. That is why setting expectations is such an essential technique. In this chapter we will discover what sets expectations, and once we know, we will review how to set them. But first, we need to refresh some grammatical knowledge because grammar plays a role in the alignment of thoughts between reader and writer. A well-written sentence sets clear expectations that align the reader’s thoughts and feelings with the writer’s thoughts and feelings. Alignment is necessary to avoid distortions, misinterpretations, or ambiguity.

Expectations from grammar

Main clause—subordinate clause

A clause contains a subject and a verb.

Learning needs to be semi-supervised.

Subject Verb

A subordinate clause does not stand alone; to be understood, it needs a Main Clause.

Subordinate clause → Because variation within each class is large, Main clause → learning needs to be semi-supervised.

A sentence may have two independent clauses, which stand alone. They are separated by punctuation and often have a contrasting hinge (’however’ and ’but’).

Independent clause Generally, supervision is required Punctuation; Other independent clause however, for classes with low variations it is not required.

Independent clause Generally, supervision is required Punctuation, Other independent clause but it is not required for classes with low variations.

These independent clauses are kept within the same sentence to establish the contrast between required and not required. Note that they share the same subject (’supervision’).

The placement of words in a sentence influences expectations

Do you want to find out how grammar sets your expectations? I suggest that we take a small survey together. Use a pencil if you wish to be able to erase the marks after the survey. You will see four sentences, each one on the topic of Evolutionary Algorithms — computer techniques based on biological evolution to find the optimal solution to some problems. After slowly reading each sentence, mark down how you feel about them. Do not re-read multiple times or ponder the matter at length before answering, because readers generate impressions “on the fly,” as they read. One last piece of advice: if you want to make sure that the answer to a question does not influence the answer to the next question, take a short pause, look away from the book, take a sip of water, and return to the next sentence.

Feel good about Evolutionary Algorithms? Tick the box under the happy face

Feel neutral about Evolutionary Algorithms? Tick the box under the neutral face

Feel negative about Evolutionary Algorithms? Tick the box under the sad face

(1)Evolutionary Algorithms are sufficiently complex to act as robust and adaptive search techniques; however, they are simplistic from a biologist’s point of view.

(2)“Evolutionary Algorithms are simplistic from a biologist’s point of view, but they are sufficiently complex to act as robust and adaptive search techniques.”¹

(3)Although Evolutionary Algorithms are sufficiently complex to act as robust and adaptive search techniques, they are simplistic from a biologist’s point of view.

(4)Evolutionary Algorithms are simplistic from a biologist’s point of view, although they are sufficiently complex to act as robust and adaptive search techniques.

Now look back to your answers. Did you tick the same box for each sentence? If not, why not?

All four sentences present two identical facts: (1) Evolutionary Algorithms are simplistic from one point of view, and (2) Evolutionary Algorithms are sufficiently complex to act as robust and adaptive search techniques from another point of view. If you agree with one point of view (for example, if you find them simplistic), then all sentences 1 to 4 should carry the same message and be equally perceived, whatever the order of the words in the sentence. Yet, this is not the case, is it! You find some sentences favorable and others unfavorable. Something influences the way you perceive the facts presented. What is it? The answer is found in the grammar.

From a grammatical perspective, sentences 1 and 2 are similar in that they both have two independent clauses; what changes is the order of the clauses.

Looking at the opinions of a panel of 33 readers in Table 1, one sees the strong polarization of answers between the first two sentences: Sentence 1 is predominantly neutral to negative whereas sentence 2 is predominantly positive.

Table 1

Influence of the placement of the information in a sentence

To understand what happens, let’s sort the sentences according to two criteria: the majority vote of the panel, and the way the Evolutionary Algorithms are featured at the end of each sentence — simplistic being negative and sufficiently complex being positive

People who took the survey seem to align their opinion on the opinion expressed at the end of each sentence.

To encourage the reader to agree with you on what is important, place the information you consider important at the end of a sentence.

We have not yet looked at sentence 4.

Why doesn’t sentence (4) fully behave like the other three? What changes in the sentence to change the views of the panel?

Evolutionary Algorithms are simplistic from a biologist’s point of view ← Main clause, Subordinate clause → although they are sufficiently complex to act as robust and adaptive search techniques.

The sentence the panel sees as neutral, represents a balance of opinions. It seems to be the result of a fight between two sources of influence with a bias towards the negative opinion. The negative point of view is expressed in the main clause and it seems that the panel of readers is influenced more by what comes in the main clause than by what comes in the subordinate clause. The reason people are indecisive is explained by the fight for influence:

Evolutionary Algorithms are simplistic from a biologist’s point of view is in a weak position at the beginning of the sentence, but reinforced by the strong influence of the main clause →; and although they are sufficiently complex to act as robust and adaptive search techniques has a strong position at the end of sentence (+) tempered by the weak influence of the subordinated clause (−). They balance each other.

If what we suggest is valid, then sentence (3), which like sentence (4) has a main and subordinate clause, should verify the strong role of the main clause, and it does. In sentence (3), the information that gets the most votes from the panel is in the main clause.

To encourage the reader to agree with you on what is important, place the information you consider important in the main clause.

But why stop here! We can extract more interesting guidelines from this fruitful example. You may have noticed in Table 1 that the number of indecisive people is larger for sentence (1) than for sentence (2). Why is that?

It may be a combination of two factors: punctuation and the diluted strength of the adverb ’however’. Whenever the brain encounters a punctuation like the period or the semi-colon, it stops and processes the meaning of the sentence. In the case of sentence (1), the brain gets a favorable impression of evolutionary algorithms at the semicolon pause. The second part of the sentence, starting with ’however’ in the strong position at the end of sentence, attempts to reverse that already very positive impression. It succeeds partly (negative score greater than positive score), but not totally. The reason for that partial failure is due, in my opinion, to “however’, an adverb overused to bring contrast, and often used wrongly to change topic (fake contrast). As a result the people who were positive only move to the neutral attitude, whereas the people who were neutral remain neutral or turn negative.

For sentence (2), the situation is quite different. It is very positive. Why? Again, it may be a combination of two factors: punctuation and the undiluted strength of the conjunction ’but’. There is no semantic closure after a plain comma, the brain continues reading before coming to that final closure at the end of the sentence where the strong positive impression is formed. To reinforce that positive impression, the hammer-like ’but’ rebuttal squashes the negative impressions.

To encourage the reader to agree with you on what is important, place the information you consider important after the conjunction ’but’, and/or right before a period or a semi-colon.

There is still the matter of variability in the answers of the panel — the people who did not go with the majority vote. What influenced their opinions? There are several factors, which I list here.

1)People’s temperament and outlook on life. Some are influenced more by what is positive than by what is negative.

2)People’s jobs. A biologist may place emphasis on the negative statement whereas a computer scientist may have more positive feelings for the algorithm.

3)Some people consistently voted against the majority vote. I discovered that those who voted this way were non native English speakers whose native language was based on Sanskrit. In their grammar, the important information is mostly placed at the beginning of a sentence, not at the end. So be aware that if you are in this situation after taking this test, your foreign grammar influences the way you write English, and that may confuse readers.

4)Your answer to the first question may bias your answer to the second question, and so on (remanence effect). That is why I regularly change the sentence order when conducting the test. The good news is (as far as you are concerned) that the guidelines stated here are confirmed by the 280 scientists who took the test.

Consider starting sentences with a subordinate clause so that they end with a convincing main clause.

Forget about Mrs. Smith, your English teacher who told you to “Never start a sentence with BeCause”, and she stressed every syllable to show you she meant it. Of course, had you asked “Why, Mrs. Smith?” She would probably have responded: “Because I say so”.

The following words create a subordinate clause at the head of a sentence so that the main clause can end the sentence. They also make excellent attention-getters, and really shine at setting expectations.

Because…If…Since…Given that…When…Although…Instead of…While…

Take a word like because. Placed at the beginning of a sentence, because announces an upcoming consequence in the main clause. It sets a delay between the time the expectation is raised and the time it is fulfilled. That delay creates tension and momentum. The tension acts like a metallic spring: it pulls reading forward. In the real world, the length of a spring matters less than its strength; likewise, a sentence’s length matters less than the tension created by the arrangement of its words.

To build suspense within a sentence, start the sentence with a subordinate clause. This creates a tension that the end of the sentence releases.

Dynamic sentences have words that set expectations

Which words create expectations in the next sentence?

Up to this point, we have only considered basic filtration techniques.

If you answered: the locution up to this point, the adverb only, and the adjective basic, you were absolutely right. Only shows that more is coming. Up to this point works in tandem with basic. Together, they confirm that basic filtering techniques are no longer going to be covered. More advanced filtering techniques will now be considered. How do we know that? Take away the adjective basic.

Up to this point, we have only considered filtration techniques.

With basic missing, the reader expects that we are leaving the topic of filtration techniques to look at other techniques. So it is the adjective basic that sets expectations. Now test yourself with the next sentence. Which are the words that generate expectations?

Dengue fever epidemic in India does not occur at the beginning of the monsoon season.

The words that set expectations are the negation does not and the noun beginning.

1)Expectation of explanation — Why doesn’t it occur at the beginning?

2)Expectation of elaboration — When exactly does it start?

This sentence indirectly tells us that dengue fever epidemic occurs, not at the beginning but sometimes during the Monsoon season. Its purpose is to emphasize when it starts. The writer prepares the reader to an explanation of the conditions for the epidemic to take place.

Adjectives, adverbs, and nouns associated with a negation or with a pejorative meaning, allow fast transfer of expectations to their opposites.

Compare contrasted (A) with flat (B).

1. Trapping is unimportant at high temperatures where there is plenty of energy to escape. But trapping leads to very slow dynamics at low temperature.

2. Trapping is important at low temperature because it leads to very slow dynamics, as there is not much energy for the molecules to escape.

1)The total number of words for both texts is identical: 24 words. Paragraph (A) has two sentences: the first has one main clause and one subordinate clause, and the second has one independent clause. Each sentence is short (14 and 10 words). Sentence (B) is long (24 words) and the main clause has two cascaded subordinated clauses (“because”, “as”) making it more complex.

Sentences that end with nested sub-clauses create weak expectations and they move further and further away from the main topic of the sentence.

2)With (A), the reader is alerted on the role of low temperatures. Sentence (B) is less contrasted because low and high temperatures are no longer compared; it creates the expectation that the next sentence will keep the same topic, i.e. trapping. Sentence (B) does not create the same compelling wish to know more about “very slow dynamics” because it is tucked away in the middle of the long sentence.

Unguided, the default expectation is that the topic does not change from one sentence to the next.

3)But the punctuation has changed. The full stop in the original (A) has been replaced by a comma in (B). The full stop is better. It gives more breathing space than the comma. During this very useful breathing space, the brain processes the sentence and lets its meaning sink in. Based on this fresh understanding, the brain then sets expectations for the next sentence.

Place the punctuation where it creates expectations.

Cognitive neuroimaging

Michael works in a cognitive neuroscience laboratory. He explores the brain with functional MRI, and seeks to understand what happens in our working memory. I ask him what happens when we read. Michael, an extremely well organized man, retrieves from his computer two papers from Peter Hagoort: “Integration of Word Meaning and World Knowledge in Language Comprehension,” and “How the brain solves the binding problem for language: a neuro-computational model of syntactic processing.”

Somewhat intimidated by the titles, I ask if he would not mind explaining in layperson’s terms what happens when we read. Still facing his Macbook Pro, he quickly thinks and asks, “Do you use Spotlight?” I reply, “Of course.” Any Mac owner is familiar with the search function of Spotlight, the little white magnifying glass located in the top right corner of the Mac menu bar. “Look here,” he says. I get closer to his screen. “As I type each letter in Hagoort’s name, the search engine immediately updates the search results. H, then HA, then HAG. Notice how the list is now very small; one more letter and we will have zoomed down to Hagoort’s papers.”

As soon as he types the letter O, the list shrinks down to a few items, and among them, Hagoort’s papers. He turns towards me as I sit back into the chair facing his desk. “You see,” he says, “it looks as though the Mac tries to guess what you are looking for. Similarly, while you read, your brain is active, forever seeking where the author is going with his sentence. It analyses both syntax and meaning at the same time, going from one to the other transparently.”