Caroline Mellor - The applicants

College essays that made a difference - Princeton Review 2010

Caroline Mellor
The applicants

Caroline ran varsity cross country all four years of high school (she was captain during her junior and senior years), and varsity track and field for three years. Caroline also took an interest in child development and earned her 90-hour clock certification for preschool teachers, which allowed her to work half-days at a Montessori preschool during her senior year. In addition, she interned at the Education Directorate of the American Psychological Association, co-edited her high school’s psychology journal, presented research at the Eastern Psychological Association’s Convention, and was selected from among her high school peers for the county social science award.

Stats

SAT: 1180 (610 Critical Reading, 570 Math)

SAT Subject Test(s): 590 Math, 610 World History

High School GPA: 3.6

High School: Walt Whitman High School, Bethesda, MD

Hometown: Bethesda, MD/Washington D.C.

Gender: Female

Race: Caucasian

Applied To

Bard College (early decision)

Reed College (early action)

Essay

Caroline used the following essay in his applications to the schools listed above.

Describe a personal struggle

Balancing the See-Saw

“Beat her up,” one of them shrieked; referring to me, while the four of them pounded their fists into their hands on the sidewalk corner. I had merely suggested that we run faster, but my cross country teammates’ response demonstrated that they didn’t agree. Although they were entirely kidding about the violence, such a strong statement was quite frustrating.

For me, running isn’t just a stress reliever; it has become a way of life. I look forward to escaping into the looming trees of the Capital Crescent Trail, for this place has more worth to me than just being able to escape into it. Deemed the cross country team’s “den mother,” I’m always ready to take someone home, help them stretch, listen to her trials and tribulations during a long run, and even organize our annual running camp trip to Vermont. But in this instance, they wanted to do less than what was required to accomplish our best and my not allowing the weaker choice to me made, just didn’t settle well with them.

After an awkward silence, we began our daily run with the temporary resolution to decide on the eventual pace as we went. We darted past the middle school and across the neighborhoods, with only casual comments, such as announcing when one spotted a yellow car as we made our way into downtown Bethesda. The first red light we came to changed too fast, leaving us with no time to move to a solution on our work ethic conflict. We continued past the commercial glitter at every store, and came to the intersection of Green Twig Road and Wisconsin Avenue. Then my twinkle of laughter at a street name turned into an explosion of giggles at our absurd conflict. I then exclaimed, “girls, where are we going?” Laura, Rachel, and Kate looked at me as if I belonged in the “abnormal” section of my Psychology textbook, while the only action Becca could muster was to raise her hands to her ears and hiss at me. Then I added, “ah, no, not our route. I meant the point of being here, are you guys … feeling okay - enough for a smudge more?” As the concern echoed through my stern voice, I received understanding nods from my fellow runners as we pressed on through the buzz of traffic to finish our run at the harder pace I had requested.

We did make out daily water stop at a local coffee shop, where they always seem to feel sorry for us, as when we come struggling in, they respond quickly with out cups of water. When we returned from our run, we may all have been on “runner’s highs,” but the discontented sentiments seemed to have disappeared on their own. We had completed a sweltering nine mile run, and now as we strode to the same sidewalk corner, words of “thanks, the run felt amazing,” came from my teammates.

I knew that tomorrow I would be able to physically and mentally take myself farther, while today I had compromised just enough to keep the team bonded. Even though I may have sacrificed a portion of my own success for the team, that part will be returned in the form of the team’s success and happiness. That afternoon I felt marvelous myself and almost enjoyed being the “bad guy.” It is important to listen to those around you, but only while eavesdropping on what you are thinking yourself.

See this page to find out where this student got in.