Writing Smart, 3rd edition - Princeton Review 2018

Words, sentences, and paragraphs

How words function

“What can be said at all, can be said clearly.”

—Ludwig Wittgenstein

“Prefer the familiar word to the far-fetched. Prefer the concrete to the abstract. Prefer the single word to the circumlocution. Prefer the short word to the long.”

—H.W. and F.G. Fowler

In the previous chapter, we focused on basic parts of speech and punctuation—the building blocks of writing. But good writing is more than perfect grammar (though that certainly helps). To write well—to engage your reader, further your argument, to make a point, whatever your intention may be—you need to know how those building blocks of the English language can be pulled together to create well-constructed sentences that clearly convey your intended meaning. Part of this involves making the right word choices—using words that are precise and clarify your point rather than obscure or confuse it. That’s what this chapter is about: how to use words to construct good sentences, which become well-thought-out paragraphs, which are then joined together to become your completed written work, whether that’s a business memo, a research paper, or personal essay.

Words

Here are some fundamental rules regarding word choice that you should follow in any type of formal writing.

1. Stay away from slang

Written English has different standards than spoken English. When you are conversing you can amplify your meaning with gestures, facial expressions, tone of voice, and word emphasis. These aids are not available to your written communication. Thus, your written work must be as absolutely clear as you can make it. Some of your readers may be unfamiliar with colloquial uses of certain words, so unless you are going to clearly explain the use of a word in its context, do not use it in a nonstandard way.

2. The best word isn’t always the biggest word

“Henceforth I would desire to act in a more extemporaneous manner.”

equals

“I want to be more spontaneous.”

The perfect word to use is the one that most nearly conveys exactly what you mean. That is, the best word is the most precise word. Do not consult your thesaurus for the largest word you can squeeze into your sentence. In most cases, this will make your sentence awkward and ungainly, and will give your prose a stiff and pretentious air. If the most precise word also happens to be one with many syllables, so be it. But don’t use big words just to use them.

3. Avoid repetition

One use of the thesaurus that is defensible is as a means to avoid excessive repetition. Certain words will be repeated in a paper or essay. For example, if your piece is about dogs, it will be difficult to avoid using the word “dog,” but avoid repetition when possible.

4. Be aware of redundancy

Redundancy involves using more words than necessary to convey meaning. For example, the phrase “free gift” is redundant because gifts, by definition, are free.

Here are a few redundancies that often show up in writing:

Some other common redundancies include:

· small in size

· circulate around

· true fact

· joint partnership

· close to the point of

· in this day and time

· consensus of opinion

· pair of twins (unless you mean four people)

· cooperate together, collaborate together

· close proximity

· contemporary writer of today

· if and when

· mingle together

· new innovation

· joint cooperation

· 3:00 A.M. in the morning

· 6:00 P.M. at night

Unfortunately, redundancy can crop up anywhere, not just with words but in sentences and paragraphs as well. Unnecessary sentences weaken your writing. Make sure that each word, sentence, and paragraph contributes something essential to the whole. If it does not, omit it.

5. When in doubt, use a dictionary

Do you see the problem with this sign? The correct word to use here is “prosecuted,” not “persecuted.” When in doubt, check your usage. If you are not certain of the word or the form of the word you are using, look it up in the dictionary. There are many words that are commonly confused, but they are very simple to check.

6. Keep your writing gender-neutral

The term gender-neutral writing refers to writing that avoids making unjustified assumptions about the gender of the person it describes. For example, writers have traditionally used the pronoun he to refer to an anonymous or generic person (“if a writer wants to be successful, he needs to understand grammar”). But times have changed. These days, the readers of your work, as well as the people you are writing about, are likely to be of both genders equally. It’s in your best interest to make your reader feel included by your choice of words, so you should strive for gender-neutral writing at all times.

This doesn’t mean that you have to butcher your writing. At most it will mean a little extra work, but in return you will reduce the risk of alienating your readers with language that could be interpreted as chauvinistic or outmoded. And the extra time you put into crafting your sentences carefully will probably make your writing more precise and easier to read.

Finally, you should use gender-neutral language because it follows our golden rule: avoid trouble. If a sentence could be misinterpreted, find another way to write it. The following is a quick guide for writing in a gender-neutral fashion.

The obvious stuff: nouns

Whenever possible, avoid using generic terms based on the word “man.”

All I need to complete this job are a few good people.

Not: All I need to complete this job are a few good men.

Also, use the neutral form of job titles.

To protest this law, write to your congressional representative.

Not: To protest this law, write to your congressman.

The harder stuff: pronouns and possessives

The trickier part of gender-neutral writing is learning how to deal with pronouns. Here are some ways you can write your sentences to avoid these pitfalls.

1. Use the plural they or them.

Because there is no gender-neutral singular pronoun in English, use the plural pronouns they and them to refer to people in general. The solution is to put everything in plural form.

Yes: Students should solve their own problems.

No: Every student should solve his own problem.

2. Replace the possessive with a, an, or the.

Often there’s no reason to use his—you can simply replace it with a or the.

Yes: Give each candidate the exam upon arrival.

No: Give each candidate his exam as soon as he arrives.

3. Eliminate the pronoun or possessive.

In some cases, you can simply remove the pronoun or possessive, and the sentence will still be perfectly readable.

Yes: Anyone who wants an ice cream should bring three dollars to class on Monday.

No: Anyone who wants an ice cream should bring his three dollars to class on Monday.

4. Replace he and him with he or she and his with his or her.

Yes: Each student should consult his or her advisor before registering.

No: Each student should consult his advisor before registering.

Another way to fix this sentence would be to follow #2:

Each student should consult an advisor before registering.

5. Replace he/him with you/your or one/one’s or another neutral noun.

Yes: If you want to prevent confusion, you should avoid using he except when referring to a male.

No: If a writer wants to prevent confusion, he should avoid using the word he, unless he is referring to a male.

If one wants to prevent confusion, one should avoid using the word he except when referring to a male. Also to prevent confusion, writers should avoid using the word he except when referring to a male.

7. Choose the right point of view

Avoid “I” in academic writing

Before you write, decide from what point of view you will write. This means you need to decide whether you want to refer to yourself in the first person singular, “I,” as you would do in a personal essay. Alternatively, you may be writing about something from which you want to maintain a certain emotional distance—you may be writing an academic paper describing experiments you don’t entirely approve of. Whatever the case may be, avoiding the first person “I” or “we” allows you to describe without necessarily putting your opinions in where they are not asked for. Most academic papers and exams are better written with no reference to the “I” author.

Use “I” in personal writing

Using the first person can make a writer appear more intimate with her reader, and make the writing more accessible. In a personal essay for a college or graduate school, the use of the first person “I” is expected and acceptable.

Use “You” with caution

Directly addressing the reader is a dicey business, only to be attempted if you are sure it is both necessary and helpful to what you are writing. It is advisable if you are writing a how-to book, as we are doing here. In any other type of writing, avoid the use of the word “you.” The easiest way to do this is to leave “you” understood. Here’s an example:

Picture two men standing on the side of the road.

It is clear the author wants you the reader to picture the two men, but he avoids saying “you.” The other, more formal way of avoiding “you” is to use “one,” as in, “One never knows what one has missed until the moment has passed.” It does sound stiff, but it can be useful, particularly in academic prose in which you should never use “you.”

Be consistent

Whatever point of view you select, stick with it throughout your piece. “We think it is important that I be consistent when she writes this book.” See how inconsistency can throw you off? The less opportunity the reader has to be confused or befuddled, the better off the writer is.

8. Beware of your verbal crutch

Most people have a word that they use as a catch-all for a variety of meanings. These words have their uses, but you should understand what your particular crutch means to you, whether it is “weird” or “like” or “whatever.” You can then search it out in your writing and clarify your meaning by examining where it appears and substituting the word you really mean. If you cannot identify your personal verbal tic, get a second opinion by asking a friend or family member. Most likely they will know immediately.

9. Use words correctly

“He really weirded me out with that peanut butter pizza.” Aside from the myriad of other faults in the preceding sentence, the word “weird” is used as a verb. “Weird” is not a verb; it is an adjective. There are enough words in the English language for you to express your meaning without resorting to this type of incorrect usage. For formal writing, try this instead:

I was horrified and disgusted by his peanut butter pizza.

10. Use the verb you intend

When your verbs start to become dramatic, beware. The drama of your prose should come from your thoughts, not from melodramatic words. If you want to say someone walked into the street and asked someone for directions, by all means say so. For instance, you probably want to avoid, “He leapt off the curb and begged for help.” In most cases, the more reserved your words, the more creative your writing.

11. Don’t use don’t

We know, we know, it isn’t fair. If we can use contractions, how come you can’t? Well, when writing something formal and academic, you must try to do what your instructor wants you to do. And the rule is, avoid using contractions in academic writing. As stilted as it may sound, use “do not” instead of “don’t,” and so on, unless you are writing something very informal that is meant to be conversational.

12. Keep punctuation simple (and correct)

Let’s eat Aunt Edna!

Let’s eat, Aunt Edna!

Proper punctuation is indispensable to good writing. If the example above is any indication, commas can save lives. Look back to Chapter 2 for a review of the basic rules, or check out Grammar Smart for a more in-depth review. However, you should take care to avoid excessive punctuation. The powerful effect of your writing should come from the words you use, not from a series of exclamation points, dashes, or question marks.

Sentences

The sentence is the primary unit of grammar. Sentence structure is malleable—bendable, if you will. With proper punctuation and diction (word choice), syntax (sentence structure) can be changed to fit the needs of your audience. The way you’d write to a group of school children is far different from how you’d write to adults. You can always cover the same concepts, but the delivery of the subject matter is crucial to audience understanding.

Good sentences communicate a point clearly. When writing a sentence, it is helpful to ask yourself, “Does it say exactly what I mean?” Form what you want to say in your head, and then write that down. If your meaning is obscured, your sentence needs to be reworked. Often, the best writing is the simplest. So keep it simple.

The following guidelines will help you achieve greater clarity in your writing, but do not expect to write perfect sentences every time. Good writing also requires editing, revising, and rewriting, which we’ll cover in the next chapter.

1. Vary sentence structure and style

Sentences can start with their subjects, as this one just did. Or they can start with conjunctions, like this sentence. Using the same structure, sentence after sentence, can give your prose a droning, repetitive quality. So change it up every so often; your writing should be a mix of short and compound sentences.

2. Maintain reasonable expectations of your sentences

Most sentences convey one or two images. Don’t overload your sentence with a freight too heavy for it to bear by adding comma after comma and phrase after phrase. You can always extend your metaphor or story or paragraph by adding sentences. Long sentences are difficult to control, so stick to manageable lengths. It is also easier to identify and repair flaws in shorter sentences.

I want to go to college and become more educated, because education is very important, and the economy is calling for people who have rigorous scholastic training. Too much.

I want to go to college to become more educated. Education is very important, and the economy is calling for people with rigorous scholastic training. Better.

3. Use the active voice

I bought a bagel.

or

A bagel was bought by me.

The first sentence is in the active voice, and the second is in passive voice. Whenever possible, use the active voice. The active voice is more concise, cogent, and appealing than passive; overall, it is simply more effective.

4. Use humor with caution

While many types of writing can often benefit from humor, a humorous tone is difficult to master. When you write, you can’t rely on timing or inflection as you do when speaking; therefore, your sentences need to be carefully crafted in order to convey the correct tone. One way to check tone is to read aloud what you have written, using as little vocal inflection as possible. Is it still funny? If so, good work! If not, it’s best to rework it or cut it altogether.

5. Include the right amount of description

Description is an incredibly helpful tool in writing. It allows the writer to show more clearly what he or she intended.

For example, Nick included the following sentence in an essay on his college application. He is describing his employment in an effort to communicate to the admissions officer that because of his particular job, he has experience that will make him an outstanding candidate. Here is the sentence:

I work.

As the reader of this sentence, do you clearly understand what Nick is trying to communicate? Not really, and neither would the admissions counselor. How about:

I work at the ice cream parlor.

Now you know more about Nick because he has altered his sentence to express more specifically what he is trying to communicate. Even so, if this is to be his introductory sentence, a sentence that includes more information may be appropriate:

I work at the ice cream parlor near my house, and my job has taught me much about my neighbors.

But beware, while clear communication is essential, over-describing by tacking on description after description will muddy the prose and render the focus of the sentence unclear. For example:

I work at the ice cream parlor near my house, which is in a low grey building made of old crumbling cinder block piled high and ominous against the mostly grey skies you find in Boston in November, and my job has taught me much about my neighbors.

Nick may walk away from that sentence patting himself on the back for his moving and descriptive turns of phrase, but as the reader, you get an entirely different message from the previous sentence. Too much description ends up weakening the entire sentence. Does he enjoy his work? Is that the point? Or is the ice cream parlor a depressing place? Or is his house? Unless you intend to use contradictions to enhance a sentence’s meaning, avoid them.

6. Understand metaphor, but use it sparingly

“Once at least in the life of every human, whether he be brute or trembling daffodil, comes a moment of complete gastronomic satisfaction.”

—M.F.K. Fisher

A metaphor is a word or image used to describe something not like itself. Take the quote above, for example. A human is a trembling daffodil.

A metaphor is one of the most effective weapons in your arsenal. “A weapon?” you say. Ah, we were speaking metaphorically. Equating a word such as “weapon” to another is using metaphor. “That test was a piece of cake” is another metaphor. An extended metaphor lasts beyond the one image and can go on for sentences, or even paragraphs.

Extended metaphors are a difficult enterprise and are probably best avoided until you are more comfortable. Don’t use a metaphor unless you feel that the thing you are describing could be better described in no other way. Otherwise, you will end up writing something like, “The car was a tiger running over the plains in the jungle,” when it would have been far clearer to just write what you probably meant: “The car was fast and sleek.”

Also avoid mixing metaphors. A mixed metaphor starts out with one image and ends with another: “That test was a piece of cake and it was smooth sailing all the way.” The reader is left wondering whether the test is the cake or the water. You don’t want to confuse your audience.

7. Understand simile, but use it sparingly

“As alarming as the Gaines-burgers were, their soy-meal began to seem like an old friend when the time came to try some canned dog foods.”

—Ann Hodgman

The sentence above refers to soy-meal seeming like an old friend, a perfect example of simile. A simile resembles a metaphor, but it uses the words like or as. Like other descriptive methods, simile should only be used when necessary to your sentence.

8. Create images with your writing

“Viewed from a suitable height, the aggregating clusters of medical scientists in the bright sunlight of the boardwalk at Atlantic City, swarmed there from everywhere for the annual meetings, have the look of assemblages of social insects.”

—Lewis Thomas

Good writing is clear writing. One of the great ways to make writing clear is to provide a vivid mental image for the reader to “see.” The better you can set the scene, the easier it will be for the reader to follow you.

9. Ask rhetorical questions

“Where have all the thighs gone? Where are the thighs of yesteryear? This is not exactly a litany raised by many, but the heartfelt concern of a few. In recent memory I do not believe that I have entered a restaurant where thighs are allowed to stand alone proudly by themselves. I mean chicken thighs, though duck and turkey thighs are also lonely and neglected.”

—Jim Harrison

A rhetorical question is a question designed to stir up thought, and is not necessarily intended to be answered.

What is the use of a rhetorical question? Well, it can help you get your reader thinking about what is going through your mind. It can also help the reader to ask the question of himself, the question to which you will then thoughtfully provide the answer. Like other writing techniques, use rhetorical questions purposefully. Do not overuse them.

10. Know when to use a quotation

Have you noticed the quotations sprinkled throughout this chapter? Quotations can be helpful when you want to emphasize a certain point or further engage your reader. Just be careful not to overdo it. There should always be more of your writing in a paper than anyone else’s. Don’t quote for the sake of quoting; quote because someone has said something integral to your topic or point, and has said it far better than you can.

11. Follow grammatical conventions

That is, follow the rules of grammar. Don’t think of grammatical conventions as limitations; think of them as a helpful guide to clearer, more effective communication. Continue to review Chapter 2 as you write.

Paragraphs

Once you have sentences, you can form paragraphs. Generally, each paragraph expresses a separate thought or idea. Paragraphs make reading easier, like cutting a steak into pieces to eat it, rather than trying to cram the whole thing into your mouth. Bear that image in mind both when you write and when you revise.

Paragraphs can be set off by indentation or by double-spacing. Either is acceptable, though indentation is the standard in most prose, and double-spacing is generally relegated to letter formats.

Starting a new paragraph requires a transition. Arrange your paragraphs so each one leads logically and seamlessly to the next. If you are going to start an entirely new thought that is not clearly connected to the previous paragraph, you may want to both indent and double-space, or start a new chapter if that sort of division is appropriate.

A few words about modern technology

To conclude this chapter, we would like to take some time to discuss these guidelines for word use and sentence construction as they apply to modes of communication most of us use every day: texting and social media.

Texting

Texting is writing, and the rules discussed in this chapter apply. The few extra seconds that it takes to type a proper English sentence often means the difference between presenting yourself well and presenting yourself, well—not so well. Here are some guidelines to follow:

1. Texts should never contain errors in grammar, diction, punctuation, or spelling. No matter how much of a rush you may be in, writing “your” instead of “you’re” or texting a run-on sentence is wrong. Always check your texts before hitting the “send” button and fix any typos or errors created by autocorrect.

2. If you must use abbreviations and acronyms, use them sparingly. An occasional use of “textspeak” when chatting with friends or family is certainly fine, especially when used cleverly or to humorous effect. Too many, however, can suggest laziness, sloppiness, and poor writing ability. Texts sent in a professional context, or to recipients whom you don’t know well, should not contain this type of shorthand.

3. Emojis and emoticons should be used to supplement words, not replace them. These symbols are fun to use and can enhance a joke or emphasize feelings. Unfortunately, however, they are often used as verbal crutches. Sending an electronic symbol when a written response is appropriate can be considered a “cop out.” Taking the time to formulate a thoughtful reply, especially in awkward or delicate situations, is often what separates the good writer from the mediocre one.

4. Texts should be appropriate for the recipient. As with any piece of writing, you must consider your audience and alter your style accordingly. Group texts can be problematic when sent indiscriminately. Surely you would not use the same tone with your twelve-year-old nephew that you would with your boss, so be careful whom you include. If you must send texts to multiple recipients, consider writing several different messages of substance (one for family, another for business colleagues, etc.).

5. “Textspeak” has no place in formal writing. Slang terms, non-standard abbreviations and spellings, and emoticons have no place in any formal piece of writing. Unless you are quoting someone or otherwise indicate that a word or phrase deviates from proper English, do not use it. It’s just that simple.

Social media

Modern technology has created wonderful opportunities for us to communicate with people all over the globe in an instant and to exchange ideas on an unprecedented scale. Unfortunately, however, people who post publicly, whether on Facebook, Twitter, or other social media channel, do not always present themselves in the best light. The perceived anonymity of social media and the speed with which we can reply to one another leads to many exchanges that are not written with careful thought or attention to tone.

Before hitting “post,” take a moment to review what you’ve written and make sure you are being clear, tactful and sensitive, and—ideally—grammatically correct. While you may be presenting yourself as an authority on a certain subject, you will undermine your own credibility if your response contains incorrect diction or grammatical errors. Further, is the post well-crafted, or simply written in haste as the result of strong emotion? More importantly, is it a respectful and dignified piece of writing? If you would be ashamed to have those words publicly attributed to you, don’t hit “submit” or “post.” Always remember that once you send an electronic communication, there is no taking it back. It is forever preserved in cyberspace.

Recommended reading

The Staff of the Princeton Review, Grammar Smart, Penguin Random House.

Longman, Roget’s Thesaurus of Words and Phrases, Penguin Random House.

William Strunk and E. B. White, The Elements of Style, Macmillan.